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Gentle readers of the guest blog post,
As you may recall, the last guest blog post concluded with a picture of some piping hot, potato tasting, boiled green bananas and a teaser about how the following guest blog post would likely discuss preparing them. Well, I'm sorry, but that's not what this post is about.
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| Medium hand. Large hole. |
And (you'll have to take my word since this picture is insufficient) they are really deep, too.
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| Depth. |
See how prolific these holes are?
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| Holy neighborhood. |
Guess what lives in them. Go on, guess. I'll wait.
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| I am startlingly large. |
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| Crab thinking about heading over to his neighbor's giant hole-home. |
Crabs! The large land crab! These things are huge, especially when magnified by the powerful lens of fear. Seriously though, I have seen smaller dogs. Seriously.
Look at how creepy this one looks with it's legs poking out? (Insert "the willies" here)
Look at how creepy this one looks with it's legs poking out? (Insert "the willies" here)
Who can think of green banana starchiness, no matter how delicious, at a time like this?
In each of the various sized holes, ranging from half-dollar sized, to large enough that I wouldn't say I'm fervently anti-dropping a grenade down it, lives a crab ranging from a fairly small half-dollar size, to a well-now-it's-getting-silly level of large. Like salad plate sized, I guess- and that just doesn't seem necessary.
Crabs, as you know, are supposed to live in/near the ocean. Sure, they come on the beaches and dig holes and it's fun to watch them skittle about while kids chase them at night with flashlights, but crabs aren't supposed to leave the sand. Apparently though, some crabs didn't like the hustle and bustle of a life that demanded a constant back and forth skittering from ocean to sand. They've decided to leave the noisiness behind and head on out to the suburbs. Maybe they wanted to find a place with a nice lawn and a fence. Well, now they've adapted to life on land. Do you know what this means? They've got the ocean and the land. That's where I spend most of my time! By some logic, one might conclude that crabs will next develop the ability to fly, or at least ungracefully hop a few feet at a time like a chicken. At some point it constitutes terrorism. That's how senselessly terrifying these things are.
Now, in order to prepare you on how to best handle an encounter with the land crab, here are some things to know:
- They are edible just like all the other crabs. It's a little gross actually seeing the trash they like to live around and consume and then think about folks eating them, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger- unless it pinches. Still, I wouldn't recommend eating one, mostly because they give me the willies.
- They are caught with traps. Fruit is commonly used as the bait (mangoes and green bananas were mentioned by the guy who stopped to ask me why I was taking pictures of an animal as commonplace to him as the squirrel is to us).
- Land crabs are just as afraid of people as their smaller and more endearing sand crab cousins are. They also tend to shy away from having their picture taken.
- Land crabs have no interest in chasing you and are unsatisfying to chase (unlike the sand crab, which is hilarious). You need really only take a step or make a noise, such as talking at a regular volume, to encourage them to evacuate back into the safety of their giant hole-home.
- They like shady, moist environments and can be most easily seen near dusk or on a cloudy, drizzly day.
To recap: There are large land crabs about. Even though they are somewhat illusive, their hole-homes are everywhere which cause me a fantastically confusing mixture of emotions including curiosity and terror. Though land crabs look terrifying and can get unnecessarily large, they are largely harmless. Their favorite pastime is running away and hiding. You can catch one with a trap using green bananas as bait.
See what I did there? Full circle. You're welcome. Assuming I don't discover another large crustacean living among us, the next guest blog post should be about preparing green bananas. Fingers crossed.
In each of the various sized holes, ranging from half-dollar sized, to large enough that I wouldn't say I'm fervently anti-dropping a grenade down it, lives a crab ranging from a fairly small half-dollar size, to a well-now-it's-getting-silly level of large. Like salad plate sized, I guess- and that just doesn't seem necessary.
Crabs, as you know, are supposed to live in/near the ocean. Sure, they come on the beaches and dig holes and it's fun to watch them skittle about while kids chase them at night with flashlights, but crabs aren't supposed to leave the sand. Apparently though, some crabs didn't like the hustle and bustle of a life that demanded a constant back and forth skittering from ocean to sand. They've decided to leave the noisiness behind and head on out to the suburbs. Maybe they wanted to find a place with a nice lawn and a fence. Well, now they've adapted to life on land. Do you know what this means? They've got the ocean and the land. That's where I spend most of my time! By some logic, one might conclude that crabs will next develop the ability to fly, or at least ungracefully hop a few feet at a time like a chicken. At some point it constitutes terrorism. That's how senselessly terrifying these things are.
Now, in order to prepare you on how to best handle an encounter with the land crab, here are some things to know:
- They are edible just like all the other crabs. It's a little gross actually seeing the trash they like to live around and consume and then think about folks eating them, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger- unless it pinches. Still, I wouldn't recommend eating one, mostly because they give me the willies.
- They are caught with traps. Fruit is commonly used as the bait (mangoes and green bananas were mentioned by the guy who stopped to ask me why I was taking pictures of an animal as commonplace to him as the squirrel is to us).
- Land crabs are just as afraid of people as their smaller and more endearing sand crab cousins are. They also tend to shy away from having their picture taken.
- Land crabs have no interest in chasing you and are unsatisfying to chase (unlike the sand crab, which is hilarious). You need really only take a step or make a noise, such as talking at a regular volume, to encourage them to evacuate back into the safety of their giant hole-home.
- They like shady, moist environments and can be most easily seen near dusk or on a cloudy, drizzly day.
To recap: There are large land crabs about. Even though they are somewhat illusive, their hole-homes are everywhere which cause me a fantastically confusing mixture of emotions including curiosity and terror. Though land crabs look terrifying and can get unnecessarily large, they are largely harmless. Their favorite pastime is running away and hiding. You can catch one with a trap using green bananas as bait.
See what I did there? Full circle. You're welcome. Assuming I don't discover another large crustacean living among us, the next guest blog post should be about preparing green bananas. Fingers crossed.
You make me frightened to come visit. But I still will. Gypsies-Abroad is that important to me.
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